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What Your Looks Say about You

It's a fact: We often judge each other by the way we look. But that doesn't mean you need to obsess about your exterior to get the positive attention you deserve. By making just a small effort to put your best face forward, you'll feel better and likely be met with praise (which will in turn boost your confidence even more).

Author: Sandra Prior
Date: May 12, 2010 - 10:02:12 AM

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It's a fact: We often judge each other by the way we look. But that doesn't mean you need to obsess about your exterior to get the positive attention you deserve. By making just a small effort to put your best face forward, you'll feel better and likely be met with praise (which will in turn boost your confidence even more).

 

An extra-long fringe or side-swept hair that masks half your face can be a dramatic style statement, but sometimes it suggests you're covering up something (acne, ageing) or that you're a little nervous around people. Women who are self-conscious or worried about their skin often hide behind their hair. Regardless of what hairstyles are in or out at the moment, a woman who is confident tends to wear her hair in a way that reveals her face and accentuates her features. Whether it's brushed back or tucked behind an ear, it broadcasts, ‘I feel good about how I look.’

 

Bushy brows imply spending time on yourself doesn't seem worth the effort. At the other extreme, over-plucked ones suggest a tendency towards obsessiveness, which isn't healthy either. (It may seem trivial, but others do notice untouched or heavily plucked eyebrows, particularly if your hair and make-up don't look ‘done.’) Strike a balance by aiming to get your arches professionally groomed a few times a year or, at the very least, plucking what falls prominently above or below your brow line.

 

In general, when we're sick, sad, tired, or moody, we forgo make-up. It's rare to meet someone so confident that she shows off her natural looks by going bare on a regular basis (hey, even supermodels wear make-up in public). The right amount of make-up can do wonders for one's self-esteem, which can directly boost confidence. Light to moderate make-up says you don't have much to hide - you're comfortable with your looks. Heavy make-up may make others wonder what you're trying to cover up. You don't need a face full of cosmetics, but some concealer to hide imperfections along with a little lipstick and mascara can make you look (and feel) instantly pulled together.

 

The more comfortable you are with yourself and your body, the more likely you are to wear clothes that show off its shape. If you have a thin face but sport lots of layers to hide your body (which is probably also slender), it might be a sign that you're unhappy with the way you look even though you're not overweight. Conversely, if you have a full face and wear baggy clothes, you may be concealing a recent weight gain. The bottom line: Don clothes that fit you well no matter your size; it suggests a sense of body pride.

 

If you're constantly picking at something (ragged cuticles, a peeling sunburn, a pimple), others may see you as anxious and stressed. Worse yet, persistent picking can cause discoloration and scars. One way to nip this problem in the bud is to notice when you're doing it and steer clear of situations that bring out the behavior. If you have a magnifying mirror in your bathroom, throw it away; examining your skin in minute detail will only feed your desire to pick. Cuticle oil or hydrocortisone cream can squelch the urge to tug at cuticles and peeling skin, respectively.

 

When you cover ground with energy and motivation, it telegraphs to the world that you're self-assured and full of life. When you don't, the message is just the opposite. Slow, shuffling steps don't just say you're vulnerable, they shout it: Women who are targets of street crime have been proven in studies to walk with slower, less purposeful, less confident strides.

 

Avoiding eye contact can suggest anxiety, depression, embarrassment, shyness, or vague discomfort. Ask yourself if you look people in the eye when you speak to them (picture how you communicate at work or on a date). It's a skill you can practice and improve upon - try doing it while sharing a happy childhood memory with someone (a topic most people can comfortably discuss). The more often you do it, the simpler it will become.

 

If you don't take a quick look in a mirror and check yourself out before meeting someone and consequently show up disheveled, it can project a lack of respect for the person you're getting together with. It may also mean you don't think how you look can make a difference, that you really don't care about how you look, or that you don't have the time to look polished. Regardless of the reason, you're neglecting and/or undervaluing yourself. It's time to give yourself permission to indulge in two seconds of vanity. Take a visual inventory of your teeth (anything stuck there?) and make-up (any smudges?) so you can face the world with confidence.

 

Sandra Prior runs her own bodybuilding website at http://bodybuild.rr.nu

View all articles by Sandra Prior

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